I'd heard good things about the 2002 Hong Kong horror flick The Eye, and finally decided to check it out. Something in my brain has short-circuited, however, and while I did, in fact, watch the film and enjoy it, I can't think of a damn thing to say about it.I mean...nothing. You should turn back now before I embarrass myself any further.
No, really- go. Come back tomorrow and I'll have something to say, I swear. But today...today is a wash.
"Well, Stacie, why the hell are you writing then? Why don't you just wait until you figure out something worthwhile to say, rather than simply blathering on about nothing? Why waste my time putting all these useless words up here? What gives? You're a jerk, Stacie...a jerk."
OK, maybe you're right. I probably shouldn't be typing away if I have nothing to say, and I most definitely should not hit "publish post" when I'm done. But you know what? I'm gonna. That's right, I'm gonna! And while you're reading this and thinking "My god I'm bored!", you'll see that my next sentence is about how I knew you were going to be bored and aren't you bored right now? And let me tell you, that'll be some postmodern shit right there. Some boring ass postmodern shit.
I told you my mental capacities would deteriorate by the end of the month, didn't I? We all knew going into this endeavor that eventually it would come down to a post just like this one, right? Where I'm no longer able to formulate cohesive thoughts on film, where I just go on and on and no one cares! This is no review. This is a train wreck. Let us all hope that I come out the other side of this manic episode with a little shred of my brain remaining and perhaps, a teeny little shred of my dignity. It's doubtful, but if we all link our metaphorical pinks together and think positively, it might just happen.
You know, it's a very minor tragedy that the B-52s are most famous for "Love Shack". It sucks, and "Legal Tender" is a much better pop song.
No, I'm not drunk. I am, however, feeling used up like a late-70s Times Square hooker.
The Eye. Not bad. Some creepy moments, but I saw it and that was that. I give it 7.5 out of 10 trips to the time-out chair.
Oh, and +10 points and a designation: cool to anyone who gets the post title reference.
6 comments:
I see... Harry Hamlin... in a... toga...
Ray Harryhausen, requiescat in pace.
Ding ding ding! You win, Bill.
And when I point out that it was none other than Claire Bloom as Hera in that flick, it all comes full circle.
Or, at least, I can pretend it does.
THE EYE 2 is supposedly pretty good, too, although apparently a different type of movie than the first... like it's more a sequel in name, but I don't know what that exactly means. But two reviews I've read have pointed that out.
It stars that cutie from THE TRANSPORTER, Shu Qi (or Qi Shu, in some circles... I guess Asian last names are actually said first, so when Eastern actors come to make Western made films, we have no idea what to do with them. Yeah, in Akira Kurosawa's book "Something like an Autobiography," it was a little weird reading Mifune Toshiro all the time...)
Also, have you seen THE MOTHMAN PROPHECIES? Some similarities with THE EYE there, especially the ending of course. Well, mostly the ending.
But they're both creepy. Well, I thought MOTHMAN was extremely creepy, and also very disciplined because they really don't show you much... I mean, THE EYE is more overtly supernatural imagery-wise and plot-wise in a way by comparison.
Finally: DAMMIT! I really wanted those points! But I had no idea what you were talking about!
But, you, YOU, PONDER!! You've made me this raving points whore by spontaneously feeding me some before like so much innocent candy... now I got a freaking simian in a funny suit and a bellboy cap wielding a mean abacus
astride my freaking back!! No, he DOESN'T know how to use the abacus!! But he's still freaking hitting me with it...!!
ARRGGHHH!
This has nothing to do with Japan, ghosts, or Clash of the Titans, but I though "Planet Claire," with that sort of Peter Gunn/Spy Hunter du-du-dhun-na-dhun-na-dhun-na bassline deserved to be the B-52's biggest hit. But I guess that's why I'm here, cluttering up your blog with my comments instead running Warner Records.
Another link that I think you might like, if you're still all about that "Dallas" thing:
http://thesoundtracksthattimeforgot.blogspot.com/2006/08/dallas-season-3-collection-3102.html
Yeah, "The Eye." Good idea, executed competently. Ummm, yeah, hmmm. Oh, and I can't wait to see how us Americans are gonna screw it up. We'll probably take the good idea and "finesse" it until it's a mediocre idea and we'll (truly) execute it...that's it - just execute it...until it's DOA. Get it? Yeah...
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