cogito ergo blog

...or, It’s Kind of Like Herpes But With Fewer Open Sores…I Hope.

Once upon a time, the fine folks at The Thinking Blog came up with something called The Thinking Blogger Awards- awards given to…umm…blogs that make you...umm...think (resisting cheap C + C Music Factory joke…resisting…resisting…urge fading…urge gone). While most awards simply provide the recipient with a lovely, shiny plaque or mayhaps a gift basket of some variety, The Thinking Blogger Awards are different: they provide the winner with a title…and a task. It’s a meme, dammit, a MEME! Winners must choose 5 blogs that they feel are deserving of the prestigious title, so on and so on, ad moebius strip infinitum.

Making my usual web-go-rounds whilst enjoying a refreshing glass of Crystal Light (fucking aye right I believe in me!), I nearly did a spit-take when I hit Pat Piper’s wonderful Lazy Eye Theatre and discovered that he was giving me a Thinking Blogger’s Award. Here’s what he had to say about the ol’ Final Girl:

I have only recently been turned on to Stacie Ponder's blog Final Girl and man am I lucky to have found it. Recently Eli Roth asked his MySpace friends to take non-horror movie fans to Hostel Part II to get them turned on to horror, which I found to be an idiotic request. Instead they should check out Stacie's site. Not your usual horror fare, Stacie doesn't dress her blog with the macabre even though she spends most of her time talking about 70's and 80's horror movies. Instead, she makes horror palatable, taking funny stabs at horror movies and cliches. Don't believe me? Check out her Tribute To Moustaches of Horror or her post When Nerds Attack. It's one thing to write a review of a movie, it's another to make that review entertainment for someone who isn't even considering ever watching that movie. That's Stacie and that's something. Stacie, I hardly know ye, but take this award and use it to fend off the boogeyman when he jumps through the window right behind you. And we'll see you in the sequel.

How nice is THAT? I am so so SO incredibly grateful. When I started Final Girl a few years ago, I had no idea that people would actually…you know, read the damn thing. I was really enjoying what my pal Kevin Melrose was doing over at Dark, But Shining and given that the horror blogosphere was still pretty tiny at the time, I figured why not? I loves me some horror movies…why not write about them? I made slasher flicks my niche and went from there. FG started out with your typical new-colt legs (ie shitty, boring posts), but eventually I expanded some beyond slashers and I think needle found groove in delicious vinyl fashion. Two years in and I’m more thrilled with FG than I ever could have anticipated, and yes, I still want to marry this blog someday. No, seriously, in 50 years or so I hope to be coming at you from Whispering Pines Retirement Home or some shit, complaining about the 5463287324908th remake of My Bloody Valentine whilst still singing the praises of The Haunting, The Descent, and Shark Attack 3: Megalodon.

I truly and sincerely appreciate each and every person who reads Final Girl, no matter what he, she, or it may be wearing. Without you, I’d be nothing!

Wait, that’s not true. You know, even if my readership was only me I’d probably still be writing about horror movies…but since I’d be the only person reading it there’d most likely be a lot more talk of secret crushes and should I buy some new shoes? I don’t really feel like spending the money but I’m kind of tired of these…

Anyway, thanks to Lazy Eye Theatre, I must abide by The Rules of the Meme:

1) If, and only if your blog is one that is tagged on my list below, you must write a post with links to five other blogs you like that consistently make you think (hence, the Thinking Blogger’s Award).

2) Link to this post so people will know whose good idea all this was.

3) Proudly display the “Thinking Blogger Award” logo with a link to the post you wrote.


There are so many varieties of blogs out there and so many ass-kickeriffic blogs I read frequently, that it was difficult to choose only 5…but folks, don’t hate the playa- hate the game.

Okay, okay…it was difficult to choose because I simply hate thinking. There, I said it…another secret is out.

KIM MORGAN, BLOGGERNAUT: Given that Kim Morgan blogs for approximately 459687 sites, I probably could have made her my entire five. No matter where I’m reading her words, however (or listening to them- Kim filled in for Roger Ebert on a recent-ish episode of Ebert and Roeper and is frequently seen elsewhere around the tube) (“frequently seen elsewhere around the tube” is not a euphemism, I swear), her writing is always a lesson in cinema: the woman loves loves LOVES movies and you know what? Rabid passion such as hers is both infectious and inspiring. She knows her shit like nobody's business, but she's never pedantic. She’s seen it all, but she's never jaded. While I don’t always agree with her assessments (meaning, of course, that sometimes she’s wrong), I’m always learning something new or simply marveling at the depth of her knowledge- knowledge that never gets in the way of her readability. She’s got a bitchin car, she wields a sly sense of humor, she’s always making lists, and she loves horror movies almost as much as I do. What more do you need to know? I completely, unabashedly adore Kim Morgan, and you should, too. Read her writings at Sunset Gun. Or MSN Movies Filter. Or The Huffington Post. Or ClickStar. I’m probably forgetting several hundred sites, but those should tide you over.

CINEBEATS: I discovered Cinebeats…Confessions of a Cinephile through The Horror Blog’s weekly Roundtable: Cinebeats blogger Kimberly and I are both regular contributors. In other words, I’m a new convert to the Cinebeats, but glory hallelujah! Kimberly delves into all manner of film from the 60s and 70s and she delves…err, really well. Take her recent retrospective post about the awesome Tura Satana- I’m simultaneously loving it and thinking “Man, I gotta do something like that.” And man alive if Cinebeats ain’t a pretty blog to behold.

THE SCREENGRAB: This group effort over at Nerve.com simply has it all for the (mostly) indie crowd: news, reviews, essays, retrospectives, interviews, and my personal favorite, the Weekly Top 10. Past subjects have included Nude Scenes We Could Really Have Done Without and the Worst Accents in Movie History, complete with YouTube clips (or sometimes not: the bloggers had a rough time drumming up clips of Burgess Meredith's nude scene...we're all fortunate that you can't, in fact, find everything on YouTube). Man…I gotta do something like that. The Screengrab is like a spicy cinematic jambalaya, and I'm like that old guy who was popular for 20 minutes a long time ago- you know, the guy who talked all cajun-style and cooked or something. In other words, I love The Screengrab.

JOHN KENNETH MUIR: Mr Muir has penned two books that are essential to my film reference library: Horror Films of the 1970s and, more recently, Horror Films of the 1980s. Each tome is simply mammoth- upwards of 700 pages each- and full of fantastic critical insight from someone who clearly loves the genre. Imagine my delight when I discovered his blog! Go on, imagine it! Do you hear Lesley Gore’s “Sunshine and Lollipops” playing in the background? Well, you should. Muir covers everything from film to television to books to retro toys with no-holds-barred affection and brains. I should be such a blogger.

GROOVY AGE OF HORROR: Curt Purcell has been blogging about fumetti, gialli, comics, books, and the writing process for a dog’s age, and I’ve always considered it to be an honor to be included in his blogroll. Sometimes he simply posts eye-popping comics pages or luscious paperback covers; othertimes he’s got extensive reviews or in-depth analysis. Groovy Age, which has grown enough to include a small cadre of additional writers, is truly a wonderful resource for…well, for all things Groovy. I’m certainly not the first to laud Curt with a shoutout for all his effort, and you can bet I won’t be the last.

There you go, folks, winners of The Thinking Blogger Awards as bestowed by me. Thanks to all the bloggers I’ve listed for providing me with food for thought, for entertaining me, and for consistently increasing my must see and must read lists. Thanks once again to Pat at Lazy Eye for the honor and the task.

Now then…should I buy some new shoes?