Gooble gobble, y'all...it's Thanksgiving. For Americans.
I'm about to embark on a journey fraught with many dangers...let's call it The Quest for a Get-Together. Wine, women, men, probably no song, fake turkey, real turkey, and crappy movies. Will I return from this adventure with my mind and soul intact? I should hope so...growing up, they didn't call me "Pitfall Harriet" for nothin'*.
I sincerely wish you all a wonderful holiday...even if you're not American and your day won't include gluttony and sloth in the name of the day where the Pilgrims gave thanks and began the long process of hostile land takeover and genocide**. Hooray!
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*No one has ever called me "Pitfall Harriett".
**Yes, that's not completely accurate, but let me save you some time, anonymous, by qualifying right now that it's a joke. Is it a good joke? Meh, it's okay. Truth be told, I much prefer this one, which some people might find offensive...yes, consider that a warning: I walked in on my grandparents having sex and now I can't eat raisins anymore. Not because they're wrinkly, but because he was shoving raisins in her pussy. Happy holidays!
First off, I'm tres confused. There's that poll on the side of your blog but I never seen your hair don't even know what it looks like. What am I doing wrong here? I hope you have an awesome holiday Stacey and eat enough to-furkey to choke a young chicken.
ReplyDeleteYes, I was reminded that it's Thanksgiving for only us Americans when our London office tried to get us to come in and work on a project for them today. You don't think they're still mad about that whole revolution thing, do you?
ReplyDeleteHappy American Thanksgiving, Stacie!
Anonymity does seem to be a very large factor in the douchbag equation doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteIt isn't all bad though. Ok yeah the anonymous in the ID4 thread was humorless, gutless, and pretty much pointless. But they did give you a solid quote! Just imagine how sweet that would look on the back of a book cover, or as the subtitle of a documentary based on your life.
I believe that your days of never being referred to as "Pitfall Harriett" are over. Also had I been drinking at the time, your grandparents joke would have killed my laptop.
Stop me before I get all psycho-analytic on the film "Freaks"...
ReplyDeleteThough I don't think the same could be said for "Blood Freak", possibly a Christian film that's more graphic than "The Passion of the Christ", but ludicrous due to the fact the so-called 'mutant' just looks like a dude with a bad turkey mask.
Happy Thanksgiving, Pitfall Harriet!
ReplyDelete(Oops. Now someone has called you Pitfall Harriet. Crap. Sorry. Man, I ruin everything.)
I'll never eat raisins again. Jesus Christ. And why did that make me horny?
ReplyDeleteAw, man! Don't *even* make me drive to Wisconsin and get my Atari & Kaboom cartridge out of storage! :)
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