killer tracks

One of my favorite things about horror movies is the all-too-rare "completely effing incongruous song". Now, I'm not talking about a misguided soundtrack, or the awful generic heavy metal that is constantly droning throughout most indie horror flicks.

Tangent: what's up with that, anyway? Are directors afraid of silence and/or ambient noise? TURN OFF THE MUSIC, IT WILL BE OKAY.

Sorry, had to get that off my chest. Now, what I am talking about, Willis, is the random song that doesn't much fit with the mood or atmosphere of the film whatsoever. This song may have you scratching your head. This song may pull you out of the moment- but the rarest of the rare pulls you out of the moment with straight-up awesomeness. Such is the case with these, my five favorite WTF? horror movie songs. I listen to them on my iPod because I am that hip (tell me I'm hip!). Here they are, in total countdown to YESSSS! order.

Listen: Kingdom of the Spiders

Before we get to The Cow Who Can Act, we're treated to some truly bizarre music during the opening credits: "Peaceful Verde Valley" by Dorsey Burnette. I'm not sure what kind of mood this song is supposed to establish, exactly: perhaps the peace of our verde valleys is meant to be ironi-tastic. Who cares? You know you want to sing along.

Listen: Killer Party

WHY ISN'T KILLER PARTY ON DVD?

Phew, had to get that out. This 1986 movie might suffer from a case of the "What the Fuck Am I?"s- is it a slasher? a possession movie? a musical?- but what it doesn't suffer is a lack of I love it-ness. It's such a product of its time...and if you love 80s horror as much as I do, you'd be a jerk not to love Killer Party.

Oh my God, this song is so good! It accompanies both the opening and closing credits...and best of all, it's sung by the actresses who play the three leads (Vivia, Jennifer, and Phoebe).

WHY ISN'T KILLER PARTY ON DVD? I feel like starting an internet petition.

Listen: Creepshow

Short and oh so sweet is this little interlude in the opening story, "Father's Day", which finds Cass and Hank getting down. Thoughts:

1) I should have included this in my AMC column about horror movie dance scenes
2) Cass was total 80s white hotness
3) I love that this is recorded right from the movie and you can hear Cass's bangles...bangling
4) What the fuck kind of dance was Ed Harris doing, anyway?

Listen: House on the Edge of the Park

I know plenty of people who dig this David Hess-flavored rape-fest of a movie, but it's not really to my taste. What is to my taste, however, is this amazing track that accompanies a rapist-rapee dance sequence during a party at said house on said edge of said park. How can such a great song come from such a terrible film? How??

Listen: Maniac

One of these days I've got to write up some sort of review of Maniac, a film frequently slapped with the "misogynist" label- erroneously slapped, in my opinion. It's a fine line between being misogynist and being about misogyny, and I find Maniac to be in the latter category. It's not an easy movie to watch, and it's certainly not an overall pleasant experience- though it does contain some of the best stalking scenes in all of horrordom.

Whatever Maniac may be, however, it does clearly feature the MACK DADDY of fucking great incongruous horror movie songs with "Showdown". Amidst all the graphic violence, there's a scene that features sweaty creepster Joe Spinell breathing heavily while the object of his affection, Caroline Munro, photographs fashion models (that's her spouting direction and encouragement in the song). So so so sooooo good. Yippee...ki yo...ki YAAAAAAAAY!

Bonus track!

Listen: mystery song

Can you name the horror movie that features this track? I cannot, so if you know, set my mind at ease, won't you? It's the least you could do.

EDITED TO ADD: You guys rule! Mystery solved: It's the opening track for Cannibal Ferox, which I've never seen. That's some serious what-the-fuckery.